Be a WYSIWYG!

admin — Tue, 19 May 2009 01:43:45 +0000

Engineers are really smart. Unfortunately, we sometimes try to act smarter than we are. We feel like we need to come across as all-knowing, and will sometimes sit through an entire meeting of acronym soup, understanding nothing, but nodding and acting as if it’s all sinking in just fine. After all, nobody else is asking any questions. They all look like they understand just fine, so they must, right? Well - perhaps they are thinking the very same thing you are? What a productive meeting!

In a field where knowledge and intelligence is highly valued, it is often difficult to be a WYSIWYG (What You See Is What You Get, pronounced “wiz-ee-wig” for you non-engineer types). But it’s also very brave, and very effective in creating and maintaining high-quality, respectful relationships with others, thereby increasing productivity. Martha Beck calls this being “TAO”, which stands for “Transparent, Authentic, and Open”.

To be transparent means to be able “to be seen without any intervening material”. Often the intervening material is our ego. It prevents us from saying or doing what we truly want. Being transparent doesn’t mean to go around calling your boss an a** just because you happen to feel that way at that moment. What it does mean, however, is to communicate how you feel with tact and respect. When you aren’t transparent, what you really feel gets buried inside, just to simmer and ferment, occupying your thoughts and mind energy. You are responsible for communicating your thoughts and opinions. If you don’t, you cannot expect someone else to know how you feel. I’m sure we can all think of situations where we thought “If she had only told me that in the beginning, I wouldn’t have wasted all of this time!” Being up front about things can save lots of time and energy, assets that are often in short supply in the engineering world.

Authentic is defined as “not counterfeit or copied; genuine and therefore worthy of trust, reliance, or belief”. Being authentic is, simply put, being yourself. If you are a software geek, be a software geek. If you love to test, test away. But don’t sacrifice who you are to please the crowd. Everyone will do best at what they are most passionate about. We all know people like this – people on our team who are always reliable, always trustworthy, and just damn good at what they do. They are themselves, and we never have to wonder what they are really thinking or if they are going to do what they say they are going to do. They’re genuine. They’re reliable. We trust them. And therefore we don’t have to waste our own time or energy worrying about whether or not they will follow up on their tasks.

To be open means to be willing to share yourself with others, to be vulnerable. I can hear some groans and gripes right about now. Let’s just say that the typical engineer is not so much into emotional “woo-woo”. But this woo-woo has been over and over again scientifically linked to increased productivity, and that leads to more time for you to do the things you enjoy. Admit your mistakes. Admit your failures and flaws. Admit your strengths and weaknesses. Take responsibility if you mess up. This allows others to see you as you really are, that is, human, and to relate to you.

What’s standing in the way of you being a WYSIWYG? How has not being TAO gotten you in trouble?

How to Engineer Your Core of Peace

jessica — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 23:11:32 +0000

Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart. (unknown)

Do you ever feel like you’re about to pull a Milton Waddams and start the building on fire? Like every day is a series of fire drills, of running around frantically trying to squash one fire before sprinting on to the next? It’s no secret that this isn’t exactly the best environment for solid decision making.

So what can you do? Well, you may or may not be able to change the environment, but what you absolutely can do is get your mind out of fire drill mode, and into what Martha beck calls your Core of Peace. How you respond to situations depends on what state of mind you are in when you encounter them. Everything is handled better when you are operating from your Core of Peace. Everything seems to slow down. You can process what people are saying to you and be present for the immediate issue. You feel more in control. You make better decisions. Most importantly, you don’t feel like you’re about to run screaming from the building.

“Well”, you say, “that’s just awesome Jess, but how can I go about achieving this Core of Peace?” One way you can “engineer” your Core of Peace is through meditation, and luckily there is a simple and easy way to meditate, even at work. What you are trying to achieve is a still and quiet mind. Since you might look a bit funny sitting at your desk in Padmasana with mala beads in hand, and since it’s tough to achieve peace when your cube mate won’t stop hacking and coughing, step one is to

Find someplace quiet

Preferably go outside, although if you live in the Northeast like me this particular luxury is only available for about 3 months out of the year. If you can’t get outside, try to find an empty office or conference room, or even your car. You may want to get some calming music, or you may want to enjoy silence, the rhythmic sound of highway traffic, cicadas, whatever relaxes you. The point is that you do not want any distractions or interruptions.

Breathe

With your eyes closed, breathe in deeply through your nose (count to 5), then exhale slowly through your mouth (count to 5). I like to envision drawing the stress up out of my pores and muscles during the inhale, then blowing all of that stress out on the exhale. Repeat until you feel your heart rate slowing.

Quiet your body and your mind

To quiet your body, work slowly up from your toes, squeezing and releasing each muscle and body part, up through your legs, torso, and all the way up through your head. Don’t forget to keep breathing (you would be surprised how often we do).

To quiet your mind, you must clear out your thoughts. The more aggressive among us may want to think about pushing our thoughts out, while others may prefer to envision freeing them to drift away on their own. Sometimes the thoughts are persistent little buggers and just won’t lay off. A method I personally find very helpful in this situation is to watch them float by me like a ticker tape, not trying to manhandle them but instead trying to lose interest in them until they fade away. One of the most popular methods is to choose a word to focus on and repeat, for example, the infamous ‘Om’. If you don’t like ‘Om’, choose your own word but try to choose something “neutral” (don’t choose something like your spouse’s name which will likely bring up all kinds of thoughts).

Keep this up for 5 to 20 minutes depending on the time you have available. Then, slowly open your eyes. Try to sit for a few more minutes before returning to work.

It is when you feel most tense and stressed that you really need to stop what you are doing and take a meditation break so you can engineer your very own Core of Peace. Ideally, meditation can be practiced daily and become a real habit, allowing you to walk around every day with enough Zen to calm even the most rabid manager.

How do you engineer your Core of Peace?

Quiz: Test your Social-Essential Self Connection

jessica — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 21:18:34 +0000

After you check out my video on the Social and Essential selves, take some time to test your Social-Essential connection with this quiz from Martha Beck’s Finding Your Own North Star: Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live.

My life feels like a great adventure.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel sure I can solve any problem I encounter.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I have fun.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I laugh out loud.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel overwhelmed by gratitude.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I spend time in comfortable solitude.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I am fascinated by things I am learning.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel deeply understood.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


Things just seem to work out for me.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I get so involved in projects, I forget to stop.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I use my imagination.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I do things I loved when I was a kid.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


People seem to enjoy being around me.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I play.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel perfectly safe.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I get excited when it’s time to go to work.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel mentally sharp and alert.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I have really cool ideas.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I love my body.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I am flooded with love for other people.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I do new things, or old things in new ways.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I do what I want to, even if it’s scary.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I am completely relaxed with other people.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I feel intense physical pleasure.
often	sometimes	rarely	never


I am very pleased with myself in general.
often	sometimes	rarely	never

SCORING:
Before you score yourself, note that some people get kind of angry over this test. They may judge many of the experiences to be “silly, selfish, unrealistic, and morally suspect.” Some even get shocked or angry. Here goes:

If you didn’t answer “often” to every one of the questions, you could stand to be in closer contact with your essential self.

Before you get irritated, let me challenge you to pick out the items that you should not experience often. It could very well be that your social self is trying to take over and convince you it is wicked and morally corrupt to want all of these things “often”. You may never achieve a perfect score on this test. But you should never stop trying to.